Seasons

Well, we've only got one more day left of 2012. When coming to the end of a year, we begin to reflect on memories, challenges, triumphs, and the little joys along the way. This has been a year of transition for me. My year began with my last semester in college. It was surreal having to say goodbye to a place I called home for five years. But it was only a detour, a place to go temporarily to receive the tools necessary for my future. And then graduation came. It was a day that I had been waiting so long. It was a day of promise for me. I struggled all those years and at times it was difficult for me to comprehend that I will actually get to walk across that stage and receive a piece of paper. Although to some it may be just that. But to me it is so much more. It not only says I am capable, but it is also my proof of victory. When I got my little piece of paper signed by a few people with a stamp of recognition, I felt accomplished. I have my diploma.

So then comes the many questions of "So what next?" Many people may be annoyed by how many times they've been asked. I welcome them because it invites me to share my dreams. There have been times when I thought "Now what?" I went through all those years and so what now? I have lived the next seven months just step-by-step. I didn't have a job when I graduated and a month later I got a call for one. One in which I'm still working. I also have a great place to live. I don't know what things will look like after my lease is up, but this is where I'm at. 

Soon I have to start paying off student loans. It is so intimidating to think of that. But I know my God is so much bigger than my school debt. He kept me at this school and I know he will provide for me to pay it off in his timing. I have learned in these past five years to not worry about it. Of course since I am human, I am not immune to "Worry Wart Syndrome" but it has become easier for me to put complete faith in God. 

Part of what I've learned post graduation is having to spend my own time with God. Meaning, I have to be proactive about my relationship with God. This is also going through a transition. I don't necessarily like being in a transitional period. But after it's done, I see how much I've grown. Being in a Christian college was so easy to have "God-time" all the time. In my time of alone time with God I have just learned to be still and live. I really believe this is the season I am in right now. I am not given any direction at the moment but I know I will be ready when I do.

As I look forward to the new year, I really believe this will be a year of renewal and change. We never know what to expect but for now, I'm just praying and waiting on the Lord. Dwelling in his presence is all I need. He has sustained me, provided for me, encouraged me, and guided me. So now there is even more reason for me to be still, be joyful, and have faith.